MoneyMaking Arguments
by Shire hobbit
Summary: The Ricardo's and the Mertzes make a bet. Their bet is: Which couple can keep from agruing the longest? Finally finished!
1. Who Can Get Along Longer?

Disclaimer: I do not own the show 'I Love Lucy', or any of the characters ****

Disclaimer: I do not own the show 'I Love Lucy', or any of the characters. This story is only for enjoyment, so I hope you like it ...

~~~~~

"Lucy, that was a great dinner," Ethel said.

"Yeah, great. Thanks, Lucy! You cook better than Ethel," Fred said.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Ethel asked Fred.

"Oh now, it doesn't mean anything. Just that ... sometimes ... Lucy's food tastes better than yours. But it's not you. I mean, if we had the same things that Lucy makes, then I'm sure it'd taste just as good with you cookin'. But you don't fix it."

"Well," Ethel said. "You wormed out of it this time."

Lucy chuckled, "What'd you think, Ricky?"

"I think it was a little spicy," Ricky told her.

"Spicy!? It was just a chicken dinner," Lucy protested.

"I know, Honey. But you know I don't really care for stuff that's too spicy," Ricky said.

"But Ricky, you never told me that before," Lucy said.

"Yeah, Rick. You never mentioned anything like that," Fred defended Lucy.

"Oh Fred," Ethel said. "This is **their** argument. You stay out of it." Then Ethel turned to Ricky, "But they're both right, anyway. You never said anything."

"Now who's butting in?" Fred asked sarcastically.

"Oh, you two," Lucy said. "If Ricky doesn't like spices, he doesn't like spices." Then Lucy thought of something, "Ricky, if you thought it was too spicy, why'd you eat it? Nobody made you."

"Well," Ricky started. "If you must know, I just didn't like it that much."

"Why not, Ricky?" Ethel asked. "It was wonderful."

"Yeah, Rick..." Fred said.

"Would you two stay out of this!?" Lucy exclaimed. Then she turned to Ricky, "Why not?"

"Lucy, we've had chicken everyday this week," Ricky said. "Chicken and Rice ... Plain Chicken ... Chicken with Dip on the side ... everything 'chicken' you can think of."

"Yeah," Fred said. "If Ethel did that, I'd probably get tired of it, too."

"I thought you wanted to stay out of it, Freddie Boy," Ethel said.

"I'm not getting involved, I'm just stating a fact," Fred said sarcastically.

"Well, I'm just stating a fact when I say, 'Lucy, that was sweet of you to cook Ricky what you thought was his favorite'. There Fred,and you can't say anything. 'Cause I was just 'stating a fact'," Ethel said angrily.

"Ethel, it's a little different when --" Fred stopped as he noticed Lucy and Ricky staring at him. Ethel noticed it, too.

"Can't we have our own disagreement without it affecting you two?" Lucy asked.

"Lucy, you leave them be. We've gotta' talk. I'm sick of chicken. I don't want it anymore," Ricky said.

"Well, I'm sorry Ricky," Lucy said heatedly. "But if you don't want something, don't tell me you--" Lucy stopped, with a thoughtful look on her face.

Then she started laughing.

And laughing.

And laughing.

Until Ricky asked, "Do you think you'd mind sharing with us what's so funny?"

"I'm sorry, Ricky. But listen to us. You and me were fighting because you said you didn't want chicken. Now the Mertzes' are fighting over the fact that they're butting into our fight. And now we're fighting not only about the chicken, but we're also fighting with them about butting in. I just think it's silly."

Ethel started laughing, too, "Ya' know, she's right."

Ricky and Fred realized that she was right. But they didn't bother with the laughing.

"I'm sorry, Fred," Ricky said.

"I'm sorry, too, Rick," Fred said.

When Ethel and Lucy had stopped laughing, Ethel said, "I'm sorry Lucy. We should've minded our own business, and left."

"Oh, Ethel. Come on. You and me both know that every married couple has their fights. I'd think you'd know that. Especially by now," Lucy said, standing up to clear the table.

"What do you mean by that?" Ethel asked.

"Well, it's just that you've been married so long. Especially being married to Fred. He's such a cheapskate, he can't be the easiest to get along with," Lucy explained.

Ethel got offended. She jumped out of her seat so she could confront Lucy, "He may be a cheapskate, but he's my cheapskate. Besides, we have experience. More than you. Since we've been married longer, we know each other better that you and Ricky do. And we could even get along if we wanted to. Longer than you and Ricky could."

"Oh yeah?" Lucy asked.

"Yeah," Fred exclaimed, standing up beside Ethel.

"Oh no!" Ricky exclaimed, jumping up, and standing next to Lucy. "Just because me and Lucy haven't been married as long as you, doesn't mean we can't get along. It just means we're still young and in love, and we could get along more than you."

"Now, I don't think so. It just doesn't work that way. Me and Ethel are the more ... compatible ... couple," Fred said.

"Yeah? If you're so sure of yourself, how 'bout puttin' your money where your mouth is?" Ricky asked.

"You mean a bet?" Ethel asked.

"Yeah," Lucy said. "Why not? We can bet this: Whichever couple can keep from fighting the longest, wins. If you and Fred fight first, you lose. If me and Ricky fight first, we win."

"Hey!" Ethel protested.

"Oh," Lucy said. "If me and Ricky fight first, you lose."

"Okay," Ethel said. "Wait ... **LUCY**!!"

"Wait," Lucy said. "If me and Ricky fight first, you win."

"Yeah," said Ricky. "That sounds fair. Except we all have to be honest with each other. We don't all live together, so we'll have to be completely honest! Promise?"

"Yes," Ethel said.

"Okay," said Fred.

"I agree," Lucy said.

"Yeah, me too," said Ricky. "Okay, so ... how much do you wanna' bet?"

"How about $10.00?" Fred suggested.

"Not very confident on winning, are ya' Fred?" Lucy asked. "How about $20?"

"Now who's not very confident?" Ethel asked. "I say $35?"

"I'm so confident, I'll go $50," Ricky said.

"$50!?" Fred exclaimed. "What do you think I am? Made 'o money?"

"Well," Lucy started. "If you don't think you and Ethel could win, then don't ..."

"Hey, $50 works for me. By the end, me and Ethel will be that much richer." Fred said.

"Okay," said Ricky. "It's a deal. We'll bet $50, and whichever couple fights first, loses the bet."

"Okay for us," Ethel said.

"Good!" Lucy exclaimed.

TO BE CONTINUED ...


	2. Secretly Calling It Off

The Next Morning....

"Ricky?" Lucy asked during breakfast, "Do you think if the Mertzes have a fight, that they'll tell us?"

"Sure, they promised to," Ricky told her.

"Well, if we fight, would WE tell THEM?"

"Sure, we promised to, too."

"Ricky," Lucy said sarcastically. "Think about it. Would you **really** tell them? You wouldn't and you know it!"

"Well... yeah, probably."

"Uh huh..."

Ricky got up, "I gotta' go to work. Bye, Dear."

"Okay. Good-bye, Ricky."

Lucy cleared the table and went over to the phone. "Hi Fred, can I talk to Ethel? -- Hi Ethel. What are you doing this morning? -- Oh, I was thinking about going shopping, and I was wondering if you wanted to go with me. -- Okay, I'll be over in a minute."

She hung up the phone, went into the bedroom to get her purse, then headed for the door.

~~~~~

Ethel hung up the phone. She turned to Fred, "Lucy asked if I wanted to go shopping with her."

"And you said yes. I know, I heard your side of the conversation. I risk losing $50, and you're going shopping."

"Fred," Ethel said. "Are you still worried about that? If it's got you so worried, why did you agree to that price? You could've said no, they already know you're a penny-pincher."

"Hey! If I would've said no, they would've teased us that we weren't 'brave' enough."

There was a knock at the door.

Ethel shrugged, and walked over to the door, "That'll be Lucy. Anyway, you said yes, so we'll just have to wait and see."

~~~~~

Browsing through the dresses in the dress shop, Lucy and Ethel were talking.

"Ya' know Lucy. I think maybe we shouldn't have made that bet." She chuckled, "Fred's so worried that we'll lose."

"Yeah Ethel, I'm sorry I got so mad last night."

"I'm sorry too, but--"

"Ethel?" Lucy asked. "If you and Fred had a fight. Would you **really** tell us? Honestly?"

"Lucy, if me and Fred had a fight, it'd be so common, we wouldn't even notice that we had one. Anyway, the way Fred's acting, I don't think he'd let me tell you," Ethel said. "Would you tell us?"

Lucy chuckled, "I didn't think you would. As for us, probably not. If we had a fight, and then told you that we didn't, you'd probably believe us. Because you wouldn't have a way of REALLY knowing anyway. Ethel... if neither of us would tell anyway, what would you say to calling off the bet?"

Ethel sighed, "Fred'll be glad to hear that."

"Yeah. I don't know what Ricky'll say."

They walked by a rack, and one of the dresses caught Lucy's eye. "Hey Ethel."

"What?"

Lucy grabbed the dress, and held it up to herself, "How do you think this dress would look on me?"

Ethel looked at her. "That'd look great! But you can't buy that dress. You just bought a new one last week. If Ricky finds out you bought **another** one," Ethel shook her head.

Lucy thought a moment, "Ethel, let's not tell the boys that we called off the bet."

"Huh? Why not?"

"Well, because then if I got the dress, Ricky couldn't get mad at me. And if he did, I'd tell you, and we'd lose the bet," Lucy said.

Ethel looked confused, "But we just called the bet off."

Lucy smiled and shook her head, "But Ricky doesn't know that. All I have to do is threaten to tell you, and he won't get mad at me."

Ethel shook her head, "I don't know Lucy..."

"Oh, come on Ethel. Just don't tell the boys."

"Well... when **would** we tell the boys?"

Lucy thought, "we don't have to, we can let them do it themselves."

"How?"

Lucy waved her hand, "Nevermind. We can take care of that later tonight. But first--"

Lucy walked up to the counter, and bought the dress.


	3. Letting The Boys Know

That Night...

"Ricky, I invited the Mertzes over for dinner again. Is that okay?" Lucy asked.

"Oh, sure," he told her. She went into the kitchen, and he mumbled to himself, "Bought a $50 dress. Could've fought in front of the Mertzes, and paid the same thing."

"What was that, Dear?" Lucy called from the kitchen.

"Nothing."

~~~~~

While they were enjoying a spaghetti dinner, Lucy gave Ethel a look. "Fred?" she asked. "Have you and Ethel been fighting? Ethel said you have had some... disagreements."

"What!? No we haven't," Fred objected.

"How 'bout you Ricky?" Ethel asked. "Lucy said you've been arguing, too."

Ricky looked offended, "We haven't been arguing."

"Well Ricky, if you and Lucy have been fighting, I think it would only be fair if you told us," Fred said.

"What about you? If you were fighting, you should tell **us**!" Ricky said.

Fred shook his head, "But we weren't."

"Well neither were we," Ricky said.

"How can I know for sure?" Fred asked.

"I don't know," Ricky said. "How do I know **you're** telling the truth?"

"Because I am!"

"Well..." Ricky was silent, then he asked sarcastically. "Lucy, why would you tell Ethel we were fighting?"

"Huh? Oh, uh, we had that little disagreement this morning, remember? You said you would tell, and I said you wouldn't." Lucy said.

"Why would you say that?" Fred asked Ethel, also with sarcasm.

"Well, we uh, we, we, because we were. We were fighting this morning, too. You were worried about losing $50, and I was getting annoyed with you." Ethel said.

"So you were fighting," Ricky accused Fred.

"Well so were you," Fred fought back.

This was not going the way Lucy wanted it to. She was hoping they would call it even, and call off the bet themselves. But it wasn't working that way. "Ricky," she said suggestively. "Why don't we just call off the bet? We were both fighting, so let's just call it off."

Ricky looked at Lucy, "Why? If they fought before we did, we'll win the bet."

"Oh, Ricky! Come on... There's no way anybody can win the bet."

"Why not?"

"Why? Oh, because... because me and Ethel... we... we want you to call it off," Lucy said.

Ricky thought, "Okay. Fred? Wanna' call it off?"

"Uh huh," Fred said.

"There," Ricky said. He turned to Lucy, "Now, we have a dress to discuss."

Ethel chuckled, "See Lucy. I told you he would get mad anyway. We could've told them."

"What do you mean 'anyway'? And 'told us what'?" Ricky asked Lucy and Ethel.

Lucy glared at Ethel, and said to Ricky, "Well Ricky, me and Ethel, we... uh... we officially called off the bet this morning."

"What!" Fred exclaimed. "Why didn't you tell us?"

"Because... well... oh Ethel, what'd ya' have to say that for!?"

"Answer Fred's question. Why didn't you tell us?" Ricky asked.

Lucy sighed, and said quickly, "Because I wanted to get that dress, and if you thought the bet was still on, then you wouldn't get mad at me."

"So it was before you got the dress," Ricky accused.

"Well... Ricky, I... You... We... **OH!**... Yes," Lucy finally admitted.

"Well," Ricky said, pleased. "Then you can just take it back."

"No, Ricky. I can't take it back!" Lucy said.

"Why not?"

"'Cause I don't wanna'!"

"Lucy," Ricky said. "You take that dress back as soon as the store opens tomorrow."

"But Ricky..."

"Come on Fred, I think we should leave now," Ethel said.

"Yeah, we've seen and heard this argument before," Fred said.

~~~~~

The Next Morning...

"So Lucy, how did things turn out last night? Did Ricky let you keep the dress?" Ethel asked, sitting down on the couch.

"No," Lucy said, pouting. She sat down next to Ethel.

"Aw, you have to take it back?"

"No," Lucy said.

"But I thought you said Ricky wouldn't let you keep it."

"Yeah, he said that. But I told him I wouldn't take it back," Lucy explained.

"So..."

"So he hid it on me while I was sleeping."

"And..."

"And he took it back on his way to work this morning," Lucy finished.

"Oh. What are you gonna' do?"

"I don't know," Lucy sighed. "To get something new, I guess I'll just have to wait until the next opportunity."

"Yeah," agreed Ethel. "And you won't even wait 'till then. You see something you want, you won't wait."

Lucy shrugged guiltily, "I know."

THE END

~~~~~

Hope you liked it!! I'd like to know what you thought...


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